Oh! To be able to lead a life of "Want To's." Just imagine actually having no "Have To's!" What I hope sincerely would be a bonus for you would be the realisation that you can convert many activities from being "Have To's" into unqualified "Want To's" for yourself.
I hope you won't take me too literally. Perhaps you would like paint, to write, to cook or dance, take up a sport - the choice of what we can do is endless. It matters not what you take up as an interest. What is key, is your "wanting to" do it, for your own satisfaction. Making it solely for your pleasure and your sense of achievement is key. There need be no "Have to" about it, at all!
Life today for so many of us is a long succession of "Have To's" or at least "Ought To's". If that is not the actual reality of our lives, it can still be our perception and it can still put us under more pressure.
However doing something that is our own; doing it at our own pace; doing it because we want to get better at it, does not make it self-indulgent and selfish. This is a very important way to sustain a sense of Life Balance.
Of course, it goes without saying that to take up something manically, with total and utter missionary zeal at the expense of all other commitments would not be good idea. But finding the times in the week when you can learn a new skill is a great way to relax and restore belief in your own creative powers. That is a great feeling. And it provides an object lesson to those around us that having a more balanced lifestyle is important and is achievable.
And there is one hidden secret lesson in all this. A tutorial in simplified psychology, if you will!
Show yourself how easily and quickly you learn the tricks of the new activity of entirely your choosing, and it will show you, first, how powerfully the mind can respond to your deep desire to do something.
That's all still very different to learning a "Have To"!
But with your new chosen skill learned (or at a stage where it is well on the way to towards being acquired), then you will have the stark proof of the high worth of the important recommendation that follows..
Faced with any new "Have To" or "Ought To", forget who is imposing it on you and look for the value to you in it. Look for the value in it to those you love and to those you care about and respect. If, while you gain little and they would gain great satisfaction out of it, then look to share in their pleasure and want to do it.
The more of that value you find and can cherish, the more you will find powerful parallels with the things you have chosen to achieve. The more you do that, the quicker you will dilute that "have to" feeling. Doing that will, in turn, open the way to achieving the once "have to" goal and being able to draw great satisfaction from it as an adopted choice rather than a imposition.
Have some fun! And be canny too in finding advantages to things apparently foisted on you! And notice just how much more you achieve!
We can blot out harmful self-talk and by using the natural thinking processes resident within us, we can teach ourselves new Want to's. Try it! you will be amazed!
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